I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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