If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
