You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
