Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I just googled if crying burns calories
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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