Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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