I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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