I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
