Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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