So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
