dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
