I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
your like the ambassador to my penis.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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