So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
