so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
cat food counts as protein by the way
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
