Is it normal to miss your booty call?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
