so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize