Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Woke up backwards on a recliner
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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