I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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