I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I just found a bag of teeth...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
