Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

and trust me i need no booty pop lessons

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(203): View more from Connecticut

thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.

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(407): View more from Florida

And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."

(407): View more from Florida

That's called being sensitive.

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(541): View more from Oregon

It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.

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(310): View more from California

See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.

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(707): View more from California

Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.

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