We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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