Is it normal to miss your booty call?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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