Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
So squirting runs in the family.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
