I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
