I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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