Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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