I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
