I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
