walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Randomize
