im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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