My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
