My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
