pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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