I'd wear matching sweaters with you
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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