I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
of course. lets lasso hookers.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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