brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize