I'm going to jail i love you
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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