Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize