I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize