my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
