I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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