he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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