covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He better not be in your backpack
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
