After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
bring money and cleavage
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
