Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
