Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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