But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
