He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Randomize
