girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
