tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
