from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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