This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
