I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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